Ah Yes! - Christmas Again
I was reading a friend's blog this morning about his memories of Christmas with his children. It brought back extremely few of my own. I know that sounds strange, but if you'll bear with me, I'll explain.
I do have a few memories of Christmas. However, they are all from before I turned 9. The year I turned 9, my father decided our family would no longer celebrate Christmas. He had his reasons. First, most of the trappings of Christmas have nothing to do with the birth of Jesus. Jesus was not delivered to Joseph and Mary by Santa Clause. The bible records no presence of reindeer. His birth required no pine trees decorated. His birth is not recorded as being heralded by the burning of a yule log. His birth was only recognized by the outside world consisting of only 3 wise men. Jesus was the only person on earth, recorded at the time, to receive gifts upon his birth, and even that was up to 3 years after the fact. The bible mentions no magical sleigh and in the entirety of the bible, no mention of the existence of the North Pole. There is no biblical recognition of the existence of elves. Secondly, the only time the bible mentions a decorated tree, it was in reference to pagan practices honoring what the bible referred to as false gods. Thirdly, the only times birthdays were mentioned in the bible as being celebrated, the celebrations were described as parties that could be more nearly defined as sexual orgies. Fourthly, in all of the bible, no request was ever made to celebrate Jesus' birthday. In fact, his birth date is so obscure as to be unknowable. The date of his birth is never revealed.
The church I attended did not celebrate Christmas, and decided that this meant that God and Jesus were adamantly opposed to Jesus' birth being celebrated.
The church has very stringent views on symbolism. Symbolism means everything. And to them, the meanings of symbols never change because they can't change. Looking back, they only applied that logic to some symbols. It was this same logic that prevented celebrating Easter, Halloween, Valentine's Day and many other similarly religious holidays. We were only allowed to celebrate days commanded in the bible or days that inherently honored God in some fashion such as Thanksgiving, Mother's Day and Father's Day. (There is a verse in the bible that says "Honor thy father and thy mother.) These included the Day of Atonement, the Day of Pentecost, the Feast of Trumpets, the Feast of Tabernacles, the Last Great Day, and the Feast of Unleavened Bread. I believe there is another holy day in there, but I can't remember it offhand. All these days symbolized something of great importance mentioned in the bible. The bible itself commands the keeping of these days as being holy. The church took that very seriously, and just as seriously not keeping any holidays not commanded.
Another item on their list of logical reasons for not keeping Christmas was that it only honored Jesus one day out of the year. Our church believed Jesus, and God, should be honored every day of the year, and that keeping Christmas just provided the impetus for not doing so the rest of the year. Why they did not apply this same logic to Mother's Day or Father's Day, I can only spin my wheels in trying to figure out. So I'm not trying! After all, one can go insane trying to figure out insane logic.
Our church was consumed with the idea that symbols can only mean one thing, whatever the original intent was. Symbols could never change meaning. I disagree with that now. I believe that symbols can mean whatever meaning you assign to them in your heart. I no longer believe that God, or Jesus, hate the idea of being honored by the celebration of Christmas, or Easter, or Good Friday. Christmas was ruined for me. I can't imagine ever finding joy in the celebration of Christmas. But I don't begrudge anybody else if they do. I'm happy for them.
In my friend's blog, he spoke of the many years he spent buying many, many Christmas gifts for his children in fear that they would resent him if he gave them less. When the economy made it's predictable downturn, he
ended up having to give them less. He found that his children did not
resent him, and actually appreciated what they had even more. This makes perfect sense to me.
After reading my friend's blog, my mind was flooded with other stories, stories of friends and other people whose family members have no affection for each other. Or they may genuinely love each other, but don't know how to express it, and only express it by buying gifts one day out of the year in hopes that one day will make up for the lack of personal interaction the other 364 days of the year. Sadly, there are too many who think this is adequate.
I remember one person who used to pretend their school instructor was their mother, because their own mother wouldn't tolerate physical contact such as a hug or touching hands.
I remember one person whose father would start a fight with each member of his family at the dinner table every night until everybody at the table was either crying or arguing. The father would then sit back and smile so he could claim he was rejoicing in God in the face of adversity.
I remember some parents who have used their children as slave labor.
I remember some parents playing favorites with their children.
I remember some parents who punished their children to the point where their children were no longer able to cry, their children were just too dead inside.
I have read in the news about parents who have pimped their children as prostitutes, and fathers who have molested their daughters, and in some cases, their sons.
What Christmas gift will ever make up for these things?
Just as it is true if you believe in God and Jesus, that they should be honored every day of the year, it is also true that families should give the greatest gifts they can give each other every day of the year. Who really needs Christmas? The greatest gift you can give the ones you love is your heart, openly, unabashedly, without reservation, and without holding back. All the gifts in the world cannot make up for the lack of this. You give the ones you love your whole heart, and if you really want them to have something nice, it's not wrong to give them things, but they will KNOW you love them, fancy, expensive gifts or not. They will never resent you for giving them what they need and want the most: your love, your heart.
December 2, 2010
4:22 p.m. CST
