The Nature of Hero Worship / I Wuv Him. Hethe My Hewo!
When I was 18, I started my first office job. I had been hired as a file clerk to work in the offices at a manufacturing company in Chicago. I had many experiences working for this company. I learned many things about applying for jobs, holding a job, working with other people of many backgrounds and cultures, and learning how to get along in general. I came into contact with such a wide variety of people such as I had never been exposed before.
As a result of being exposed to a wide variety of cultures, this exposed me to the attitudes of the people coming from other cultures and their perceptions of Americans, women etc. The attitudes of immigrants facing the American culture is far different than that of people born and raised in the American culture.
One of the people I met was a young man from India. I don't know entirely what his attitude was toward Americans, what his expectations were of what he would find or his feelings about his experiences. What I do know was that after a few conversations with him, he believed me to be far different than anyone else he had ever met from America. I am not referring to just being unique. I got the distinct impression from things he said to me that he believed me to be the only pure, decent, honest, and Godly female he had ever met in America and that I had to be the only one. I got the feeling his view of me was definitely in the realm of fantasy. Correction. I KNOW his view of me was definitely in the realm of fantasy.
Take it from me. I'm an authority on the subject. I'm NOT perfect. I have faults. I make mistakes. Some of them are doozies. I may not see ALL my own faults. Nobody sees all their own faults. But I know enough of mine that I can realize there is a lot of room for improvement.
But he scared me. I became very afraid of his eventual discovery that I'm no more perfect than any other American woman, and no more perfect than any other woman on earth, or any other person on earth. His view of me was so elevated that I was afraid of what he might do when his fantasy bubble was burst. While nobody rejoices when they lose a job they love, I was rather relieved in a sense when my job was phased out. The economy had hit a drastic low, and the manufacturing company which had been in business for over 75 years closed its doors. I had to find another job. I had an easy way out. I no longer had to have any contact with my adoring fan.
His view of me was like that of a hero worshiper. I'm not saying I'm a hero. I would never say that. It wouldn't be true. The point of my post is hero worship.
There are two sides to hero worship: the behavior, expectations, perceptions and admiration of the admirer, and the behavior, expectations, perceptions and fear of the targeted hero. When things are fine between these two sides, there is a fine high-wire balancing act on the part of the hero to maintain the status quo. When things go wrong, someone is going to get hurt, either the hero or the admirer, or both.
Sometimes the targeted hero has no idea how close he is to danger until something dramatic happens.
Here's an example. This story was told by Ryan Buell, the lead paranormal investigator from A&E's show "Paranormal State." It was related during a fan chat that Ryan held on his internet show "Paranormal Insider TV." According to Ryan, shortly after beginning the first season of Paranormal State, one day he walked out of his front door of his apartment to get his mail out of the mailbox. Across the street there was a car parked with a man sitting in the driver's seat. This car had been parked there for a long time. Ryan had seen this car through his window earlier and when he went to get his mail, curiosity got the best of him and he walked over to the car to ask the man in the car if there was a problem and was there anything he needed. Arriving at the car, he saw next to the driver several pictures of himself, looking like printouts from a computer. These pictures were shot of Ryan from all over town. Suddenly realizing that his target had seen the pictures and that he could possibly be identified to the police, the driver sped off. Ryan ran back inside his apartment. He said he moved very shortly afterward.
Hero worshipers abide by many recognizable behaviors. They may include paying close attention to the person they admire...too close, spending their time getting to know all they can find out about their hero even to the degree of finding out information their hero deliberately hides, imitating their heroes such as wearing similar clothing, behaving the same ways as they perceive their hero's behavior, using the same jargon, copying their habits, reading the same books, watching the same movies, wearing the same jewelry, cutting their hair to the same style and copying the same lifestyle or working the same types of jobs. They usually want to physically be close to the location of their idol and talk to them. Hero worshipers often feel a sexual attraction to their idol. This more often than not is displayed by a fan throwing themselves at their idol and trying to get into bed with them.
Fans have the expectation that their idol wants this excessive attention and all the trappings offered by fans. They have the expectation that their attentiveness will be rewarded with love, affection, gratitude and the idol's unceasing time and energy. Often they expect their idol to answer every letter, every email, every note, all without any regard or acknowledgment that the idol gets way more than he can physically give response.
Fans have the perception that their idol has nothing to do all day but cater to the love of his fans. They have the perception that the idol is bigger, greater, more wonderful and does not have the same faults or human failings as the rest of humanity. Sometimes they have the perception that their idol does not and should not expect any privacy.
In effect, fans have an admiration to such a degree and a view of their idol that no human can live up to. It's unrealistic and idealistic. It sometimes proves dangerous and deadly.
Idols, as a result, have to decide how they respond to their fans when in close proximity. This often includes security guards, bodyguards, staff to open and read their mail, bulletproof vests, specially equipped vehicles, hiding information most people publish, home security features, etc. In addition, they usually have staff to handle fans who trespass, or handle the flow of fans in orchestrated meet-and-greets. I'm sure there are other measures they take as well.
Idols have to walk a fine line. On one hand they talk to their fans on Twitter and Facebook and Myspace. Many idols truly love their fans because they understand that their fans are the reason they have their fame and fortune. There are some that simply love people. However, there is a fear that comes along with the territory of being famous that idols soon learn. Some fans are crazy. Some fans lose all sense of ration. Idols have to be wary of their own safety. The closer an idol lets his fans get to him physically, the more attentive he becomes to potentially dangerous behaviors.
I think, at some point, an idol learns to expect craziness from almost every fan.
Idols come to the understanding that their fans don't see them as real people.
In their fear, idols do what they feel they have to do to protect themselves. Again, I'll use Ryan Buell as an example.
Ryan hosts field trips for his fans. The intended purpose of these field trips is to allow fans who want to be paranormal investigators to get some managed experience investigating locations which have been reported to be paranormally active. Ryan talks with his fans via Twitter and Facebook. He also writes a blog where he can go more into depth in explaining things that had to be cut from the show episodes. He also maintains, when time permits, an internet show where he talks with fans, takes questions from them regarding the paranormal and other topics and basically maintains a relationship with his fan base. In addition, he hosts open house events at his organization's office where about 3 or 4 times a year, fans can pay to attend these open house events and Ryan and his staff and crew offer classes on specific topics. He also created a website forum where fans can post questions and leave messages for Ryan and each other discussing just about anything that comes to their minds. This website forum is monitored by Ryan's staff. Occasionally, Ryan joins in the discussions in the forums.
Often at the field trips and hosted events, girls and guys sexually throw themselves at him, both verbally and physically. I have to give him credit. His first action is to respond directly with the individual fan and ask them to stop. If their behavior continues, his next response to these sexual or otherwise offensive maneuvers always results in the banning of these fans from ever attending the events again. In fact, the second response is immediate, not only from his crew and staff, but from his other fans. The offending fan is immediately escorted from the building and event site by his staff. When the offense is more extreme, the police are called.
When Ryan speaks to his fans on his internet show, he has moderators appointed to handle the conversation in the chat room. He allows the moderators to set the rules expanding on his general rules of what may or may not be discussed or asked. As time goes on, these rules have become more stringent and more restrictive. Fans are not allowed to tell Ryan that he's hot, that he's cute, or mention any body part. No fan is allowed to propose marriage or dating. No fan is allowed to use profanity or discuss sex. Ryan's sexuality is totally off limits with the exception of asking why he came out as bisexual in his book. Moderators have discretion as to what they do or do not allow to be discussed or mentioned. If a moderator kicks somebody out, Ryan accepts their decision, no questions asked, the action of the moderator isn't second guessed by Ryan. There are also additional rules concerning etiquette and how to behave toward other chatters.
Ryan publishes several email addresses where fans or other businesses can reach him. I'm sure he has a personal email address that he gives to his family and close friends and just as sure this one never goes out to the public. Fans sometimes send him emails telling him the very things they are not allowed to say in his fan chats on his internet show, but they are then surprised that 1) he doesn't respond to them and 2) they are read by everyone else in his office. He tries to respond to every fan email possible when he perceives that the fan has something genuine and articulate to say. Fan emails are not private. They are not seen by his eyes only. When fans send him these emails, engaging in talk that makes Ryan and/or his staff feel uncomfortable or unsafe around those fans, first, again, Ryan or one of his staff members tells the emailing fan to stop, then, if they continue, they are put on a blacklist. When tickets are sold for events, the ticket sales are stringently monitored by Ryan and his staff. Tickets have to be applied for, and if you're on the blacklist, they send you an email refusing to sell you a ticket to the event.
I have to give him credit in another area too: sensitivity toward the privacy of his fans. When there is a dispute between Ryan's group, the Paranormal Research Society, and a fan, whether that dispute arises from a letter sent to Ryan, an email sent to Ryan, or a fan that misbehaves on a field trip, any private communications between Ryan and/or his staff remains confidential and is not revealed to any other fans. This is important both on a moral and legal level. It's also important that people know this. If someone is banned from a field trip due to a letter or email, other fans will never find out that a particular fan is banned unless that fan reveals it to their friends. One the other hand, if someone has to be removed from a field trip by being escorted out, that sort of thing is self-revealing.
This brings me to my next point: perception. Idols don't have the time, money or inclination to psychologically test every person who says strange things to them in conversations, letters or emails. They rely on their first instinct, their perception of where this fan's mind may possibly be when the fan says something offbeat. Their self-preservation mode kicks in and they respond. Their perception may be right, or may be wrong. Their reaction may be the right one or mistaken. But if they perceive they may be in danger, they will take action.
Logically, with this kind of extreme emotional attachment, this sometimes leads to someone getting hurt.
In the news we are often shown the extremes that can happen to famous people. Selena Quintanilla Perez was shot by a fan she had trusted with running her string of fashion boutiques when the fan was discovered embezzling money. Steven Spielberg was stalked by a fan and had received several threats of rape and murder before the fan was caught and sent to prison on the charge of stalking. There are many more examples. You only need watch the news to find them.
But stars and celebrities are not the only ones who get hurt.
Watching Ryan Buell and his throngs of many thousands, I have seen several examples of fans who, making a comment in a fan chat, sending a tweet on twitter that at the outset sounds insulting, sexual or belittling, or sending an email worded very badly, or attending a field trip and approaching Ryan in a way Ryan perceived as sexual only to be escorted away from the event and losing the money they spent on a very expensive trip, these fans are invariably crushed. Some of them get so depressed they become suicidal. But it's not just Ryan's or his crews response and banning that accomplishes this. It's also the response and reactions of Ryan's other fans. When these things come to the attention of his other fans, they go on the attack.
I have personally witnessed fans who genuinely wanted to say something they felt was honest and warranted, who had no bad intentions, and said something Ryan and his staff perceived to be off center. These fans were abruptly banned from future field trips. Other fans, presuming Ryan could not ever possibly be mistaken, went on the attack verbally against the banned fans. It's not my point to say that Ryan was mistaken. I make no judgment here as to whether he was right or wrong. I do not know the whole truth. My point is that the fans always assume Ryan is incapable of misperceiving any issue. And that is the nature of hero worship. It is the core of what makes some fans dangerous. There are two sides to every story. It usually involves misunderstanding on BOTH sides. Where idols and fans are concerned, it also usually involves overreaction on BOTH sides. Usually neither side is 100% correct. The truth is some mixture in the middle between both sides of the story.
It is heartbreaking to watch someone self-destruct when they find their idol is not perfect and for the first time they see a flaw they didn't see before and never expected from someone they respected so much, or commit suicide because they were bashed by other fans who still don't see the human failings of the one they adore.
But that too, is part of the nature of hero worship, the crushing pain when you see your idol as only just another faulty being, and the pain of losing every friend who's also a fan of the same idol because they took the idol's word against the one fan as gospel truth.
March 4, 2011
3:29 a.m. CST
Updated March 4, 2011 @ 2:45 p.m. CST
